Lately, it seems I’ve only been having blah runs.  I keep thinking that I was way over my head signing up for this marathon thing.  It doesn’t help that this Saturday I have 15 miles on the schedule (and it’ll only be 85 degrees — almost 20 degrees cooler than last Saturday!), but I have no one to run with me, unless I force Karl to suck it up and keep up my pace, which he’ll do in a heart beat, but I know he doesn’t enjoy it.

It seems like none of my old running buddies even want to run with me anymore, since they make plans with each other to run at other times.  Maybe I’m too slow for them and they got faster?  Maybe it’s because I’m the only coupled one in the group, so I have no fun single stories?  (Like I don’t have years and years of stories behind me!)  Who knows?

Yesterday I was looking forward to running home from work, since now that I only do it once a week, it seems like such a treat!

I was also excited thinking it’s been ages since I felt any pain from running — after my hip stopped flaring up, things have been great!  I was even going to write a post on all the vitamins I’ve been taking, as it seems that it made a difference!

Then as soon as I started yesterday, my left achilles tendon started to bother me…  I ignored it for a bit, then a mile in my left shin was also burning.  I was keeping good pace (at least I think so, as my Garmin didn’t pick up any signal until AFTER the first mile), but I was just feeling off.

When I got to about 2 miles in, I gave up and started walking.  Maybe I pushed it too far running 17 miles on Saturday and needed one more day of rest? (Even though I wasn’t even sore?)  I just didn’t think it was worth throwing it all away for a 3 mile run, so pushing myself through pain sounded stupid.

Karl met me towards the end and walked the rest of the way.  I was so frustrated!

Tonight I have a group run with about 7 miles on the schedule…  This is the run that last week I gave up on the second mile and had a lovely walk the rest of the time.  I have no idea how it’s going to be like, if I’ll be in pain again (nothing hurts when I walk…), if I’ll be tired, if I can even complete the distance.

We shall see.  Right now, I’m thinking that believing I can even run a marathon was very ambitious of me.  There were a few tears last night since I know doing these long runs on my own are a recipe for failure.  I get too bored.  I enjoy running with company!  I signed up for this thing thinking I’d have at least two people my pace to train with me, and turns out I’m on my own.

Thank god for Hugi for pushing it through with me last week.

Stupid running.


Filed under Chicago Marathon Training, Training

15 responses to “Blah

  1. c~o~u~r~t~n~e~y

    Don’t give up on yourself! A marathon is definitely within your reach.
    Do you run with music? Have you considered podcasts (not like having a conversation with a live person, but if you like talking more than music…)

    Good luck on your 7 miler tonight. Keep your chin up =)

    • I run with music sometimes when I’m by myself… Podcasts might be a good idea! I also heard that audio books work, though I haven’t looked much into it, it might be worth a try.

      Thanks for the vote of confidence 🙂

  2. Michelle Vela

    I would TOTALLY Run with you-if you lived here-and I’m single too. I live in Colorado Springs-but I’m really slow-12 min. mile, and I’m JUST getting back into my Running-it took forever to log 3m yesterday on the dreadmill. I agree with listening to free podcasts on my i-Phone-they don’t even have to be about Running. I LOVE to listen to the Ted-Talks-they are so good. You are doing so great-I WISH I was up to the mileage you are. Hang in there-keep going-listen to your body-don’t push too hard. I’ve also listened to books on audio too-Dean Karno is my fav. They even have “play-aways” at the Library-audio books on a player that you can rent for free and they’ll even GIVE a set of ear buds. I usually don’t like to Run with folks too much since I’m so slow-so I take my i-phone all the time, and when I didn’t have that I litterally used a cassette player-had to have it.

    You’ll do great! Keep going trust in yourself-and remind yourself how far you’ve come, and then cut yourself a break.

    Your Running Friend,
    Michelle Vela
    Colorado Springs, Colorado

    • Michelle, thanks! I wish I could find more slow people around these parts to join me for the long runs. I can usually suck it up for the short runs but cant’ for the life of me run by myself for 1+ hours!

  3. I wish there was a local running group for me! I hate running solo as well. My mind wanders, I start to hate it, the time passes slowly, and I quit. I also HATE the treadmill more than anything!

    You are a way more experienced, talented runner than I am! I know you’re gong to kick that marathon’s butt!!

    • Tyly, maybe you can start your own? That’s what I did. I went on, started my group, put a couple of adds on Craigslist and done! I waited about a month for our “intro happy hour” and we had almost 30 people showing up!

      We used to do all the runs (and now we do most of the runs) by time instead of distance, so that everyone would start and finish together, regardless of pace. That way slow runners like me don’t have to feel left out.

  4. Poelondon

    Just discovered your site through SkinnyRunner, and I’m really enjoying it. I too have been in a bit of a running slump and have been looking for a bit of motivation, and thought maybe joining a running group would help. I’ve been looking for a group with different levels/paces and I really like ya’ll’s focus on time over distance…that’s a trick I use on myself.

    I am planning on coming out tonight for the run. I don’t know if I’ll be able to do 7 miles (it’s pretty muggy out there!), but I’m down for at least 5.

    Also: I’m not single either, so I have no ‘party stories,’ just boring domestic bliss stories. Keep your chin up and hopefully I’ll see you tonight (if I get out of work in time).

  5. Gah, training solo sucks so freaking bad I can’t even explain it. I completely admire you for training for a full marathon on your own. Hang in there, we all have shittastic runs and feel like poop. Sometimes it just happens more often than not. The heat/humidity are probably not helping!

    • d.a.r., that’s the thing, I signed up with a few friends, two who are my pace, so not once I considered I’d be stuck training on my own. So far I’ve been lucky that I have company for most of my long runs (or at least for most part of my run), but as the mileage creeps up, I can no longer hang out with those training for a half and convince them to “just go one more mile” with me.

      Training solo sucks. I like to chitchat!

  6. AllieCat

    Wish I was in your part of the country too!!! I would so love to run with you! At least you’re fiance is willing to run with you – mine just looks at me like I’m nuts each time I tell him I’m going for a run. “more power to you” is what he says! lol!! That’s right, More power to me-and you!! You can so do it!!!! Your blog makes me think that someday I could actually run the Disney Princess Half Marathon even though I can hardly run a 5K now without stopping!! lol!!!! You can do it and I can’t wait to read your blog about it! 🙂

  7. hey lady. think of yesterday as just a bad day. we all have them in our training. you’re doing SO well, and at times like these, try and think of how far you’ve come, all of the races you’ve competed in, how much you’ve accomplished! you can do this. keep on plugging away! i believe in you!

  8. Pingback: 15 Miles? Success! « I Run, You Run

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